Dealing With Cancer

The past two weeks my feelings are so mixed up. I’ve been diagnosed with mouth cancer again and not sure how to deal with it. I’ve got to have surgery again just like before and I don’t look forward to it. On November 25th – the day after Thanksgiving. I don’t know what to do or how to handle this but what am I to do?

Not only am I dealing with the cancer but Jack is showing his narcissist butt again, wanting attention. He’s mad at my family and trying to run everybody off so they don’t see his true colors and how he acts at that hospital. But the sad part is, they already know how he is. Everybody feels sorry for him and he thrives on that and attention and drama.

It’s hard enough dealing with the problem I am already facing without that big tit bag adding to my problems. Honestly, I don’t care if he comes up there or not. I’d rather he didn’t. The last time he showed out with some of the nurses at LSU and he started in on me at the hospital when I couldn’t even talk. There’s no excuse in this grown man acting like a two year old. He thrives on pity and drama, which pisses me off.

I haven’t been able to focus on my writing projects because I’ve been extremely upset but this is understandable, considering the circumstances.

The surgery is basically as before and will last 8 hours or longer. The only difference is, this time there will be no removal and replacing the bone. There will be two teams of surgeons, one working on my arm, and the other on my face. They will have to cut an artery and tissue out of my arm to reconstruct my upper gum area. I will have a flap just like on the bottom.

I don’t know yet what stage the cancer is. They will know when they do the surgery.

This is probably journal material but I haven’t written anything on my blog in awhile so I will just go with it.

More later…

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